Man in the Mirror
by jibber59
Summary: The missing scene (in my humble opinion) from The Last Dam Job. Still miss the show (thank heaven for DVDs!) and still grateful to those who created and shared it.


_The missing scene (in my humble opinion) from the end of The Last Dam Job. Still miss the show (thank heavens for DVDs!) and still express my gratitude to those who created it for us._

 _ **You have no idea who I was before all this started.**_ _ **That guy – kid. He had God in his heart and a flag on his shoulder – clean hands.**_ _ **And I ain't seen him in the mirror in over ten years.**_ _ **And believe me – I get up every morning looking for him.**_

"Nate, we need to talk about Eliot before he takes off."

"What's wrong?" Nate grimaced slightly as the wound on his side twinged with his sudden movement. The team had taken a few days after the denouement at the dam to recover from the ordeal. With Latimer and Dubenich dead – or officially missing – and their crimes attracting the attention of every know law enforcement entity in the country (and beyond), the team and decided it was a good time to go their separate ways for a short time. Make themselves a little less visible while deciding on the next course of action.

Parker and Hardison had already left town, and Eliot had prepped for his departure.

"Nothing wrong exactly. Just something you need to know about, and maybe have a little chat with him." Sophie had debated with herself over the last 24 hours before deciding to talk to Nate. The moment that had gone down between Eliot and Dubenich had scared her a little, and more importantly, worried her a lot. Telling Nate about was harder than she expected.

"After they took out the bodyguards, and Quinn handed the gun to Eliot, I assumed he would clear it and toss it, like he always did. But the look that he got in his eyes. Nate, they were so emotionless, and blacker than night. When he turned to Dubenich and aimed…I don't think I have ever been that afraid for him.

"For Dubenich?"

"Of course not – for Eliot. I was sure he had slipped back, had lost himself again. He was so – cold. I mean the chill literally rolled of his body. That gun couldn't have been five feet from Dubenich's head. He knew he was going to die. Eliot was so wired his whole body was vibrating from the tension. I could see the gun shake. I was so afraid he was going to lose himself."

"Why? I told him, told all of you – Dubenich was mine."

"I believe his exact words were _"_ _I'm thinkin' about saving my friend some trouble_."

"So how did you talk him down?"

"I didn't. I couldn't. He talked himself down. A minute later he was joking with Quinn, but Nate, the tension was still there, like he was second guessing himself. I could feel how tight he was when we got in the car. I think you should talk to him. Make sure that he is, well I guess that he is OK with how it all played out. I think he feels like he let you down. When he realized that you got shot at the dam…God Nate, he looked sick. I'm afraid that he really doesn't like himself too much right now. I'm afraid he might not come back from this little imposed break. Please – talk to him."

"So Eliot, what kind of summer vacation have you got in mind. Any countries in need of liberation?"

"Got a few friends I haven't seen for a while. Thought I'd pay them a visit."

"You're pretty loyal to your friends, aren't you? Nothing you wouldn't do for them."

Eliot tilted his head a bit and raised an eyebrow. "What are you getting at Nate? Something you want to ask me?"

"No – no questions.

"Nate, if you got a problem with me, let me know. Otherwise, I got a plane to catch."

"Sophie told me."

Eliot was quiet for half a minute. He debated playing dumb and asking what Sophie had said, but there really was no doubt as to the subject. Exactly what she had said was another story. So, play it down instead. He turned to Nate with his best "good ole country boy" look. "What – told you about my little shock tactic with Dubenich. If figured he had a little scare comin' to him. Yankin' his chain was all."

"Don't bullshit me Eliot. I know you too well for that. You don't play games, especially with guns. I know why you were ready to kill him. I get you were trying to "save me". What I want to know is what stopped you. It obviously wasn't because I asked you to stay away from him. For a guy with your military background, you don't exactly excel at following orders. So – why?

Eliot sighed softly and turned his back for a minute. Without looking back he began to speak.

"Like I told Sophie, I wanted to save you some trouble."

Nate started to interrupt, but Eliot held a hand up to stop him.

"Lookin' down the site of that gun I realized I couldn't fight your battle for you this time. You had to make your own call on this or you'd never be able put that demon down." He turned to look at Nate. "Trust me; I know a thing or two about demons."

"How did you know I wouldn't shoot him?"

"Didn't. Hoped you wouldn't – for your sake, not his. But I knew it had to be your choice. If I'd taken him out you woulda spent the rest of your life wondering where you would draw the line. Not knowing the answer to that one can eat you up almost as much as knowing it does. 'sides, I figured when push came to shove, you'd call it right."

"You let me make the decision and, because of you guys, I made the right one. So what is eating at you enough to have Sophie worried.

"Sophie worries too much."

Nate just tilted his head and looked at Eliot. Waiting.

"Dammit Nate, you got shot. You were almost killed because I took a stupid gamble. I shoulda done my job and dealt with the fallout after. I screwed up."

"Good God Eliot, is there anything you don't blame yourself for? You did what I told you to – backed off and let me do my thing. Nobody but me takes the blame on this. Every glitch isn't on you."

"A bullet isn't exactly a damn glitch! I am supposed to be protecting you – all of you. It's what I.."

Nate cut him off. "Don't you dare go there! That is not acceptable on this."

"If I can't protect you then what am I doing here?"

Nate looked at the younger man and could see the anguish in his eyes.

"Eliot. You are here because you are a part of the team. You remember the "Team" right? What you guys kept reminding about this whole job. That concept goes both ways. You are not just a hitter. When are you going to get that through your thick skull?"

"I screwed up Nate, and almost got you killed."

"Are you listening to me – to yourself? You do realize you were willing to go back on everything you have worked so hard to overcome and execute an unarmed man in order to protect your friend? Do you not get what that means?"

"Yeah – it means I'm a killer. Not exactly a news-flash Nate."

"Jeez Eliot – you weren't kidding about those demons were you? Do you ever give them a day off?"

"They don't go away Nate. They overshadow everything. Why do you think I was trying to save you from that?"

"And there it is. Did you hear what you just said? You can't save me – us – from everything Eliot. You couldn't save me from both the bullet and the demons. And watching what you go through, I'll take the bullet. I don't think I'd survive the demons."

Eliot nodded slightly. "No, you probably wouldn't." He took a deep breath, trying to gather his thoughts and slow himself down a bit. "I should have taken him out 4 years ago when all this crap started. Everything would have played out better. You weren't the only one who got hurt by that bastard."

Nate looked puzzled for a moment, then realized what he was talking about. "Wait – now you blame yourself for Jimmy? How in God's name were you supposed to predict then how this would end up?

"Because I know the Dubenichs of this world. When he set off that bomb to kill us on the very first job I shoulda seen he had no limits. It would have been a very well educated guess, and would have saved a lot of misery."

"Yeah – and what's one more demon? Right? So tell me – why didn't you?"

"Poor judgment."

"Want to give that another go? Maybe try an honest answer?"

Eliot started to turn but Nate grabbed his arm and pulled him back around. Staring down Eliot was a daunting task, but if anyone could do it, he could.

"When are you going to acknowledge that underneath all leather bands, long hair, tough guy surface is a decent man?"

"When I see that kid in the mirror again." Eliot pulled his arm free and walked away. As he reached the door, Nate spoke again.

"When you do see him, do me a favour. Tell him I am damned proud to know the man he became."

Eliot paused for a moment as he reached for the handle, then left without looking back, or saying any more. Nate was sure he could see the muscles in Eliot's back relax just a little as the door closed.

Sophie came into the room a minute later. "Do you think he'll be back?"

"Yeah – he'll be back." He smiled. "It's what he does."


End file.
